Courtney has been breathing on her own through the night. She has been comfortable doing so with the aid of a small amount of pain medication that relaxes her enough to breathe easy.
As hard as all of this nightmare is on our family and friends we can not begin to imagine the horror that Courtney must be experiencing. For an active girl to know that she can not move the way she wants to must be incredibly frustrating. But for Courtney to not be able to express herself with words has to be the most difficult of all her burdens. The pain of lying in a bed for 17 days, tubes and needles in her body, the helplessness of strangers caring for her physically - all of this is the hell to which Courtney awakes multiple times throughout the day.
Each time she is alert we let her know that she was in an accident and that she hurt her head and chest. Because of that, a machine is helping her breathe. We let her know that all of her limbs are working, that she can see and hear. We tell Courtney that her brain is healing and that in time she will be able to speak and do the things she so longs to do.
As her mother I can not express the deep pain and anguish we feel over her suffering. When she becomes upset and sometimes cry we tell her that we know she is suffering but that she is brave and strong. We tell her that everyone here at the hospital loves her so much and is taking great care of her. We also tell her about all of you - your loving prayers and support - the endless cards and emails that lift our spirits.
While we pray for Courtney's healing we also pray that she will know the peace of God in her heart. That God will calm her fears and give her the strength of mind, body and spirit to carry on this fight - a fight that none of us can begin to imagine. As Courtney was growing up she would often be fiercely stubborn. I used to say to her Dad - I don't know when she's going to need that fight and determination but when she does it will serve her well.
We pray that she hears our words of encouragement to keep up the fight and come back into our lives - whole in body, mind and spirit - to once again make us laugh, say the things that need to be said in a blunt unapologetic way, and most of all to be the source of love and joy that she has always been for everyone in her life.
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7 comments:
Me again. I'll just leave my email address here in case any readers want to contact me about the teddy bear drive. vze36ccs@verizon.net
Prayers to all,
Nora
Glad to hear that Courtney had a good night and is breathing easier.I copied the Novena for Courtney for my 12 kids at CCD. However,Barbara had already made copies for the whole Confirmation class and asked everyone to keep Courtney and her family in their prayers! So, lots of prayers coming your way!
Love, Margaret
This is a beautiful post. I love you all very much and Katy and really can't wait to be home.
Love,
"june"
Diane, you post today brought tears to my eyes. I remember Courtney as a young child trudging out on that baseball field with all that determination. I'm sure that will serve her now. We continue to keep all of you in our hearts and in our prayes. Karen
Diane Thank you for your heartfelt and loving post. Your family is awesome. Our prayers and love is sent to all of you. Brian,Yvette,Lee,Jillian
An absolute beautiful post. My daughter Marissa graduated with Courtney at LaSalle and we've been keeping up with the blog and praying daily & nightly. Marissa has told me she knows many of Courtney's friends who are keeping up with the blog and praying as well. Some are from LaSalle and some are from the Eden Park area.
Parts of the last 2 paragraphs are as if they are words of God. So, so beautiful. We will add these parts in our daily prayers for Courtney. May God bless always!!
Bob & Barbara
Very moving post, Diane. You're an amazing woman. UB
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